I Still Believe

What can You do with broken hearts?
What can You do with lives torn apart?
I thought that You could make blind eyes see
I thought that You could set captives free

Isnt that why You came
So why do I feel this way?
I guess that I'll have to say

I still believe in You whatever comes my way
I still believe in You every single day
I still believe in You no matter what they say
I still believe in You, I guess that's why its faith

This is what the SOVEREIGN Lord says...

Its been so long since I have written something like this, but I truly feel led by the Holy Spirit...I know this is for me and I hope and pray that the Lord will use this to bless someone else: 

"Tell him to stop worrying.  Tell him he doesnt need to fear the fierce anger of those two burned-out embers, King Rezin of Syria and Pekah son of Remaliah.  Yes, the kings of Syria and Israel are plotting against him saying, 'We will attack Judah and capture it for ourselves.  Then we will install the son of Tabeel as Judah's king.  BUT this is what the SOVEREIGN Lord says:  'This invasion will never happen, it will never take place.'" Isaish 7:4-7

As I have decided to start going through the book of Isaish and how I have been praying that the Lord would speak to me by the power of His Holy Spirit...these verses were illumuniated to me this morning and I felt compelled to write.  In life sometimes especially for the Christian, things dont make sense and people will come against us and thier arugements will make sense.  I know that in my own life, I have found this to be so true.  When I moved from CA to NY, before I came here, it didnt look like it was going to happen....there were so many obstacles in my way.  My own blood family members were telling me to give up on my dream because there was no way for it to happen and I just needed to accept that sometimes things just dont happen the way that we want them to.  There was wisdom in what they said, however by the power of His Holy Spirit, I heard from the Lord at the age of five years old, "You ARE going to be a doctor."  With the odds stacked against me and nothing looking like it was going to work out and my own family discouraging me, I was ready to give up until the Lord showed up and through various confirmation said, "Kia, stop worrying.  I have you.  I, the Soverign Lord have spoken that you will be a doctor."    I have been shouting from the rooftops since I was a child that I would be a doctor but I faced a lot of discouragement in many ways and the discouragement I recieved seemed very logical and made perfect sense, but Gods ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts.  As I was reading this passge, it became so real to me.  Even now, I face discouragement both natural and supernatural when it comes to schools with lots of "founded" fears and I say, "Lord, maybe this isnt what you have for me, maybe medical school and missions is not what you have...look at the giants, look at the desert...I am going to be invaded."  And the Lord, faithful as He is comes again and says, "My daughter stop worrying..."...one of the my favorite song lyrics is "that which He's spoken Hes faithful to perform; It will come to pass" from the song Faithful to Believe.  

I have been supernaturally recharged by this verses that no matter how things may look or what people may say will or will not work, at the end of the day, God is SOVEREIGN.  And He and He alone has the final word.  I have no idea what you are facing today...be it finances, marital problems, lost children, lost parents, loneliness, depression, wondering how Gods promisies will work out or wondering how something that God promised specifically to you that makes NO sense at all will come to pass espeically when facing discouragement from any avenue....my encouragement to you would be to pray, fight these battles on your knees; search the scriptures and hear what the Lord would say to you about your situation and trust in the nature of God and who He is.

May Gods grace, peace and love through Jesus Christ be with all of you.

God Bless You.

In Him,

Kia

Remember Rebekah

The last time that I decided to write like this: I was in college.  Feels like it was so long ago...people have always said to me how much they enjoy reading things that I have to say...so...I guess here it goes.  I had debated blogging again because I didnt know what to say...I didnt know if anybody would want to read it and I wasnt sure if there was anything that I wanted to share but the thing about me is that I am a control freak.  Yep...there I said it.  I like to have plans...I like to know how, when, why and where things are going to happen and if they dont happen in the way that I want them to, then well....I will make them happen in the way that I want them to.  So this is a "no plan" blog...oh boy....  It seems like so long ago when I got saved, but in truth it wasnt.  I was saved on Sept 12, 2008...so about 2 1/2 years ago...but the story of my salvation is for another day.  I was listening to a teaching by my old pastor back in CA Zach Vestneys on Genesis 27 and while I have heard this story before...for the first time I realized something: I am a lot more like Rebekah than I ever realized.  She was beautiful, smart, hard working, intelligent, faithful, loyal, comforting and she was also a control freak, a doubter and a woman who had anxiety issues. She panicked when it looked like things wouldnt go her way even when God had already told her that they would.  She did what we all do too often as believers...she believes that God will do what He said but the how is where we start to doubt and when the "how" seems impossible, we take matters into our own hands.  It is so easy for me to read this story and say wow Rebekah...how could you do that?? God was going to do what he said.  And then only to realize the only reason I can say that is because I have the entire bible to look at...story after story of Gods faithfulness and how he never breaks a promise and Rebekah didnt have a bible but she heard directly from God.  Then I was so convicted...God has shown himself faithful and strong so many times in my life and even with my Bible...I still doubt and question and face the temptation to take matters into my own hands and help God out and say...well God...since you promised to do this, let me make sure it happens just so you wont be wrong.  In this story, I see the heart of Rebekah...what she did was motivated by love...she was not a bad person, she was a great person but she was human.  She was flawed and she made mistakes.  Her mistakes cost her both her sons tragically.  As I read this story, I couldnt help but look at my own life and as I read this story it was like looking in a mirror and there was a great hope and a great sadness in my heart.  On the one hand, when I look at myself, I can NOW say I see a beautiful, smart, motivated person who has goals and knows what she wants and wants to serve the Lord and there is great hope in that and on the other side, I see a flesh that is so tempted to make sure that things go the way I want them to no matter what.  Its not about whether or not I heard from God because I have only heard from God from my own discernment once in my life...its about following Him whether I audibly hear him or not.   As I read this chapter and meditated on it, I felt one impression on my heart, "Remember Rebekah."  Remember how the servant found her and why he chose her, remember how she was comforting, remember that she was a wife and a mother and remember her mistakes and remember why she made them. To see myself in this woman is not to idolize her but to see that even in this, God was still merciful and gracious and even with the mistakes...Jacob was still named Israel and from that line came the love of my life: Jesus Christ which is miraculous and that is just the beginning of this amazing story of salvation.  I am learning so much about the Lord but if I had to sum up my lesson today it would be this: "If you want GOD'S blessings, then you have to do it GOD'S way."  Remember Rebekah...